Ouch - The guidepost of life

Last Sunday I spoke about initiation.  I suggested that in western culture many parents have abdicated giving their kids clear guideposts.  This, I suggested, is not because they are unloving; it is because they don’t know the way to go.  We have exchanged deep societally sustaining values with personal gain and greed marked by better education, better network and better job for me and mine. If that offends, so be it. A couple of people mentioned that they felt some might have been left with a sense that they are poor parents because their kids have not been given clear guideposts and their lives are reflecting this.  All parents have regrets, I know I do.  I am wrestling with parenting issues right now, today, that I am not sure what to do with.  But I am still responsible as a parent to be the grown up, to show the way and to find the way.  If we can be grown up in the boardroom or in our profession let’s be the grown up in our families too. A couple of years ago some blokes went to a conference for men.  It opened the door on male woundedness and resultant paralysis in our lives.  One thing the facilitator spoke about at great length and followed up with several extraordinary testimonies was this: it is NEVER too late! – even if a child or a parent has died he argued it is never too late!Cheryl and I discuss Musings like this with our kids. We ask them what they think? They are unanimous that they really appreciate us being willing to talk about this stuff.  They say they are especially grateful for our willingness to be tough on them but to say sorry if we were wrong. If I have regrets I can still do something, write something, learn something, become something, be forgiven for something, forgive someone else something, pray something, grow into something – it is never too late.  If it is too late, for what did Jesus die?  Wasn’t it to reconcile, restore, save and heal?  Wasn’t it miraculous, as miraculous as resurrection? But why do we leave God as our last resort rather than our first port of call? If someone is hanging on their cross in an “I am rubbish” moment, instead of conspiring with them and getting them down with lots of “there, there dear”,  why not allow Jesus to teach what He wants to teach them in that place to make you and them a better, more responsible person?  The real opportunity is to cultivate friends  who will love us and be honest and true when we’ve got real struggles we need to grow in. With you in the “ouch!” of life. Prayerful  BlessingsMalcolm