Trying to get it right

Well, as weeks go it feels to me like I have put in a shocker! That doesn't mean I haven't tried, it has just felt like everything I have touched has turned to dust.The truly devastating thing for me is that I have tried really hard. Tried to do the right thing, tried to put people first, tried to be diligent, tried to guard the truth, tried to be present and available and honest and and and.....My old boss would often quote the verse from the Psalm 130; "If God marked iniquity, who could stand?" In other words, if God drew His line in the sand saying, "Anyone on the wrong side of this line is in trouble", we would all be on the wrong side of the line. "Who could stand", is a rhetorical question. The clear implication is "no-one could stand". This week I've felt like a goner.I had a slow coffee with the Archbishop Thursday morning. I like our Archbishop, he is a good man and loves Jesus. He was sharing how much of his time is spent answering letters from disgruntled angry people who are disappointed by this or that decision that he is ultimately responsible for. He tries his best but his best falls way short of people's expectations, his expectations and God's radical minimum standard.It's hard when you try your best and fail anyway. It's instructive that I think my best effort should shield me from the real truth.... I am a fallen, broken person who cannot save himself - even from himself. Why do I try so hard to be good enough? Being good enough is irrelevant to God. Psalm 130:3 goes on to say, "but with you there is forgiveness. That is why You are feared". Forgiveness is my only hope and through Jesus I have it by the tonne.What does the Arch do when, despite his best efforts, he is the focus of people's ire, sometimes justifiably. He said he remembers who he is before a holy but infinitely loving God; he remembers that sin is endemic in him and everyone else; he forgives and seeks forgiveness as he has been forgiven by God; he remembers that God called him to where he is; and finally, the things he does or doesn't do are ultimately under God's sovereign hand whose will will prevail.Pray for the Arch. Remember the infinite love of God - try saying to yourself, "God loves me!". Hard isn't it! Remember it's not about getting it right but be wise and humble enough to think prayerfully and carefully before you blunder on. People matter.Malcolm